In Witch I feel Arty: the Witch gets ready for Totterdown's art trail

Published on: 18 Nov 2016

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In Witch I feel Arty

This Witch likes to paint and I like to think that over time I am getting better. With this in mind I decided to swap one of my very old pictures that adorns my parents' toilet wall (where my art ends up) for one of my fabulous new works of art. I had a cunning plan, I was not going to tell them. A new painting. Much better than the old one. Nice surprise. How wrong I was. They nearly divorced!

I arrive at their house, which is far away, with the new painting. While they are distracted by my army of children I sneak into their downstairs lavvy and carefully swap the pictures, putting the old one in the boot of my car. A very lovely time was had that day and we left them to enjoy some much-needed peace and quiet.

A day or two pass before I realise that I have heard nothing from my parents about their amazing new picture hanging pride of place above their downstairs throne. I call them. "Everything OK Mum?" I ask probingly. “Not really” she answers, “I am very worried about my memory.” I had a sinking feeling. “You know your picture in the downstairs loo? Well it's very strange but I can't find it anywhere." (No surprise.) "Your Dad is blaming me." (Ahh.) "I must have put it somewhere." (In my car.) "And goodness knows where this new one has come from, I really do not like it at all." (Sharp intake of breath)

Oh how they laughed when I explained what I had done. No. Really. they laughed, eventually. But I had to take the old picture back and say sorry.

Perhaps this is a sign that I should give up my dream of being a fully fledged artist. I have done the Totterdown Art Trail a couple of times now. One year I was in this amazing space in the House of Horrors. The bare room was perfect for my large paintings. I was holed up with three fellow artists and we welcomed the nosey public with smiles (the first hour), glances (the second) and yawns by the end. To pass the time I decided to ask people as they left which picture was their favorite. When they chose one of mine I gave them a Quality Street whilst fist punching the air and shouting "In your face!" to my fellow artists. My bribery was shameless. One chap I asked refused to say. He said he thought I was incredibly rude to ask and it was insensitive to my fellow artists. He took a sweet and left. 

Wowzers. Rude? I found it very interesting, we were all so different and we all had pieces of work that were liked by the various members of the public who were actually not bothered about the art but wanted to have a nosey around their neighbour's house. Yes I sold bugger all but had a great laugh and loved the community spirit of this event. Am I doing it again this year I hear you ask? Hell no. I am going to have a nosey round the houses this year like everyone else.

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